You’re grieving, dammit! (Cut yourself some slack.)
When you go through a divorce it’s like a death of love. Even if you’re the one who initiated the divorce, you will still grieve. This is because you are not only mourning the loss of your marriage, you are also grieving the loss of your hopes and dreams—the belief of what you thought your life was going to look like.
I want to emphasize that each person will go through the stages of grief differently and there is no set length of time. The ultimate goal is to get to the fifth stage: acceptance.